“You stuffed your grandmother?”
Something of a C-movie spookfest that never really seems to know where it’s headed until it kind of just ends with a casual sort of “why not?” moment. Even so, the atmosphere is suitably haunting, the sets are exquisite, and the freaky kids are freaky.
My VHS cover pull-quote: “It’s set in 1994, which is important for no discernible reason other than Kurt Cobain died then? I don’t know, but more movies should be set in the 90s Grunge era. I hope it becomes more of a thing as we break away from the 1980s.”
“A dream you dream alone is just a dream. A dream you dream together, now that’s reality.”
Nic Cage does what Nic Cage does best, surrounded by Lovecraft trappings, cosmic body horror, and alpacas.
My VHS cover pull-quote: “Forget National Treasure 3: Jefferson’s Ghost, I just want Nicolas Cage to do stuff like this and Mandy until he’s buried in his New Orleans pyramid.”
“I fibbed a little about not killing you.”
A dark, punk comedy where each character is just so damn likable that you don’t mind any of the cracked and heinous shit they’re doing.
My VHS cover pull-quote: “I wouldn’t mind being murdered so much if the killers were polite and filled with folksy wisdom about relationships.”
“Hey, come back to Derry and get murdered.”
This is humongous, epic, ultimately triumphant horror fantasy that — while not terrifying — is whimsically gruesome and allowed to lean hard into the cocaine fueled turns of the source material.
My VHS cover pull-quote: “Can we talk about across-the-board perfect casting? Okay, this has it. It also has a swelling, bleeding, plucked from a chest heart that will make you believe in shit again.”
“What’s that smell?”
A feverish, unsettling nightmare that I can’t seem to wake up from so I’m going to bang my head against things.
My VHS cover pull-quote: “Still not awake. Now bleeding. Please help.”